I guess I am slowly turning another chapter again in my life as I write this entry. It has been rough the past few months but I am slowly getting the beat again.
I realized we needed some painful setbacks for us to recalibrate our visions, our goals, and ultimately, our perspectives in life. There was this one moment when all the things that I hoped for crashed and all the trust and wishes for a smooth sailing life eventually turned into ashes.
It made me cry. I felt restless for weeks. It made me think of the many things that most of my age encounter these days — sadness–an overwhelming kind of sadness.
There were moments when I just wanted to quit, stay on the side and just do whatever I needed to do to survive a day.
I am barely living the life I wanted.
I was so tired of thinking where to go next, what to do, and live the life I am supposed to live.
But there came a day when I found hope on all that is happening. There must be something out there or someone out there watching me and directing me take a closer look on what I have right now and where I want to be.
With those few but big bumps, I am slowly appreciating the rough edges. Maybe, those were necessary to motivate me and transform me into a better person. Maybe, each problem, each day lived in desperation, each person who made me feel something — they were all necessary.
It brought me to the idea of checkpoints. Maybe I was in another checkpoint during those times. Maybe I am being led to another path or being led to another level.
Whatever it is — I came to realize that it’s normal. It is necessary and so I must move forward. There will be several checkpoints ahead of me and I must not lose hope.
under the sun 